My Newest Project

So, for those who don't know, outside of my family I have one true passion - reading. If given the chance, I would gladly spend an entire day in my bed with a good book and a cup of coffee. I've read more books than I can keep track of, but very few have actually made me cry. In fact, I think there may only be three that have. In no particular order...

So even though each one is an incredible book, Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas is the one that affected me the most, and when I recently picked it up again, I decided to use it as a basis for a new project, which I kind of hope will turn out to be one that a.) I actually finish, and b.) one that will be meaningful for more than just me.

I work at a level two trauma center, which means we get some pretty bad cases. We're also the regional burn center, and get burn patients from all over the country. I've seen some things that have made me mad, made me cry, and have changed my outlook on life. One thing I've learned is that nothing is ever certain, and each day is a gift that should be celebrated and cherished. Tomorrow is never a guarantee. So, taking that and the basis for Suzanne's Diary for Nicholas, I've decided to start a journal for my daughter. There are so many things that I know I would want to tell her, if God forbid I didn't get to watch her grow. And I can't wait to find out that I will/will not get that chance. So morbid as it may be, I'm going to keep a journal for her. I want her to know who her mother is, how I met her father, what makes me who I am. I want to make sure I give her advice about starting elementary school, surviving middle school, making the most of high school, going to college, getting married, having children, and all of the other experiences that I've had that she can learn from. I don't plan on going anywhere, so I'm going to keep this and treat it like it will just be a neat keepsake for her, to someday look inside and find out who her mom was. I don't think most kids know that their parents are "real people" and it's important to me that my girl knows that. And if our relationship is like many other mother/daughter relationships, I know there will come a time when we can't be in the same room together. I'm not looking forward to it, but I know it will probably happen. So it's important for me to know that I'll be able to tell her I love her and cherish her, even when she won't listen. And maybe someday, if she wants to, she can share it with her brother, or any other siblings she may someday have.

Like I said, if nothing else, it will hopefully be a neat keepsake for her someday. But, one day when I'm not around anymore, maybe it will be something she can treasure; a book of advice and insight on life from the woman that gave her life...

...I hope she likes it.